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Friend's engagement 'celebration' – questions about etiquette

Home Forums Engagement Friend's engagement 'celebration' – questions about etiquette

This topic contains 0 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  JessicaFay 2 years, 7 months ago.

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    JessicaFay
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    Last night, my partner and I received a Facebook invitation to the engagement celebration of a friend of ours (she and I went to high school together). The celebration is for friends only and is taking place in about a month at a restaurant/show at a cost of $50 a head (this includes dinner but not drinks). My partner was a bit putout when he saw this, as he thinks it is incredibly rude to hold an engagement party and ask the guests to pay their own way. I pointed out their use of the word ‘celebration’ rather than ‘party’. I had spoken with this friend months ago (before this night was organised) and she was telling me about her issues with her fiancé – he wants to invite all of his friends to the engagement party/wedding but she thinks they can’t afford to invite everyone so he should limit it to his closest friends. He disagrees. She doesn’t want to end up in a situation where it’s all his friends there and none of hers. Because the wedding is still a few years off, she decided to compromise at the moment by having a family only engagement party and then going out for dinner or something to celebrate with whatever friends wanted to come. I also got the impression that she doesn’t want any gifts (there is no mention of gifts in the invite either). So, these are my questions: – Do you think it’s rude that they are holding this celebration rather than inviting their friends to the official engagement party (like my partner does)? – My partner has said that we are not buying a gift (we’ve got a mortgage so don’t have a whole lot of disposable income), but I’m not sure if we should or not. Should we get a gift for the couple or is our attendance (costing us minimum $100) to the event enough?

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